Midnight Hunter
By stargirl4eva

ONE

I remember the day so clearly. My initiation.

             All I remember at first was darkness. Complete black that seemed to suck all the light and brightness out of the world.

            Then clouds started to part, slowly, to reveal a bright shining moon. Then I started to see a little more, my eyes adjusting.

            A ring of people stood around me, some staring me down, others smiling encouragingly. Either way, their stares sent shivers down my spine that made me clench my jaw.

            I turned back sharply to my Grandma that stood behind me. I begged her with my eyes. Begged her to let me go. But her gaze was as cold as everyone else’s.

            Tonight I was no one’s relative.

            I took a few deep breaths. My heart beat was the only noise. Swallowing hard, I centred myself, widening my stance.

            The drum started up and soon he walked into the circle. Viator was our leader. You could feel the respect fill the circle and everybody tensed.

            “Young one.” He demanded the attention of everyone present, but was talking to me. “You are of the age. You will be initiated tonight, like I was, like my elders were and like everyone in this circle was.”

            I could hear the whirl of electricity starting and wondered if that was what his elders had had before him.

            Blinding lights shot up around us. Suddenly it hit me how tall Viator was. I’d seen him, but always from afar. Now he was looming over me. I could also see a truck in the background backing up.

            He must have been about 7 foot, with a tall, withered stick holding him up. His long deep red robe hung from his wide shoulders.

            The stories told us he was about 150 years old, but his face barely showed it. No wrinkles or scars. In the human world, he could have looked about 35.

            But he wasn’t in the human world. None of us were anymore.

            “Embrace the light my dear child. Feel it fill you. It will be the element that guides you for your life. Showing you the path to take.”

            I closed my eyes and could still see the light. I felt tears start to fill my eyes. Not because of any emotion, but because the light was so heavy on them.

            “Although we are forced so much into the dark shadows, the light resigns inside of us. It is our home, our parent. We must always go back to it.”

            The light powered down to a dim fog of light. My eyes opened on my own accord.

I was smiling. I knew what was about to happen, and I was smiling.

Maybe he was right; maybe the light was the power within us.

“But we are forced into darkness. We are shunned, pushed back, spat on like insects.” Now he wasn’t talking to me, he was turning around the circle addressing all presence. “And so we carry on with our traditions, our lives. We will not stop because of them.”

The crowd cheered. I had seen him say a few words, but this was something new. The charisma that flowed out of him filled the people with energy.

“And so tonight, we welcome Auda to this way of life.”

Then I knew what was coming. I had heard about it enough.

One of the high up people walked over to me, holding out a silver gauntlet.

“One thing separates us from the common animal. Animals hunt for food or warmth, but they do not remember or even care that they have done it. We hunt, but we will remember each one, connect with each one.”

The back of the truck opened and they pushed out a woman. It was obvious she hadn’t eaten recently, her weakness was clear as she fell to the ground.

“Auda, you must connect with her. Your first kill is what will define you. As one of us, or as a human, so weak they will not kill for the good of themselves.” He was looking me deep in the eyes.

I kneeled down beside the human, compelled by the mentality of the group.

She was snivelling. Somewhere deep inside me, I should have felt sorry for her, begged for her to be let go. But the weakness she was clearly displaying pushed that part of me so far down.

I held out a hand for her, trying to look nice, trustworthy even. She smiled through her tears.         

She didn’t notice as I slowly moved my other hand into my coat pocket. As I grasped the handle of the knife, I smiled, trying to make mine look warm.

The hope in her eyes radiated. And it was all I could think about as I drew the blade as quickly across her throat as I could.

I threw my hand out and grasped the gauntlet. Pressing it under the oozing cut; I collected her blood as she gasped for air

Every time I look back at this point, for me, it marks where I lost my humanity.

The air was laced with iron as she fell to the ground. I rose to my feet and turned to Viator like a puppy returning a bone.

He placed his palm to the side of my face and smiled. Quietly he whispered “My Child.” His fatherly touch made me beam back at him.

He flipped open the end of his staff with his thumb; a gesture I’d never seen him use. Slowly, he tipped a blue powder into the gauntlet.

            The deep scarlet started to change. Soon it was a clear liquid.

            “Drink Auda.”

            I pressed the gauntlet to my mouth and Viator helps me tip the bottom up.

            The liquid was smooth but thicker that blood. It coated my mouth, forced its way heavily down into my stomach. It warmed me.

            But the more I drank, the hotter it became. Soon it was burning my body from the inside out. I tried to pull away, but Viator held my head in place.

            “You must drink it all.”

            I felt tears prick my eyes. The pain was becoming almost unbearable. Now the liquid felt like it had combined with the blood flowing through my own veins and I could stop it. It paced through my skin in time to my pulse, burning me as it went.

            As I took in the last few drops, I screamed and fell to my knees.

            “Young Auda. You must remember the light will guide you.”

            It felt like the light was within me right now, searing me and trying to escape. I gagged as my body threw itself forward on to my hands.

            “Do not fight it! Let it take you!”

            The tears fell from my eyes as I cried out again, like a wounded animal… like a weak wounded animal.

          I closed my eyes and tried to imagine the light from earlier. The soft light that had made me feel so good, so safe. The more I focused on that, the less I noticed the pain. Before long, the burning had dissipated and all was left was a few drops of bile.

            Breathing heavily, I managed, however shakily, to get to my feet. A few people ran to steady me.

            Viator just stood and nodded as I straightened up.

            “As you may not know little one, that liquid changed you, you are now one of us. If your body rejected it, or your mind was not strong enough, you would have died.”

            I was not aware, or happy, with that fact. I took another glance around the circle and the faces were now smiling, warm.

            “Auda. We shall assign you a mentor to teach you the ways of our people.”

            The circle parted once more as a tall man strode into the middle.

“Auda, this is Casper. He is strong and wise beyond his few years and will guide you.” I looked him up and down. His broad shoulders held a strong face, shadowed by a fringe hanging across his forehead. Dark piercing eyes shone back at me.

“Casper, do you have anything to say to our new entry?” Viator smiled warmly, still looking like a father.

“I guess she’ll have to do.” Casper said in a dry tone.

TWO

 I would do?! It was infuriating.

So as I followed him into the room, I ignored that I was blinded by the bright walls, too busy glaring to worry.

“Will you stop acting like a little girl?” He sighed, keeping his back turned to me.

“Excuse me Casper?” My Grandma’s frail but confident voice came from the door way we both turned to her. Out of the corner of my eyes, I watched Casper bow out of respect – after all, my grandma was his elder – and realised why he was less than happy with me. “I would like to just have a quick word with my grand daughter.”

“Of course Reva.”

I walked over to Grandma and was all too aware he was watching me.

“Darling,” She took my hand. “This is where you become truly Venatorian. You may think the hard work is done after last night. But you must listen to every word your mentor speaks. He’s wisdom is what will make you great.”

She kissed my forehead and I nodded when she pulled back.

“Yes Grandma.”

As she left the room, I couldn’t help but embrace the familiar feeling she spread through me. After my parents had up and left - no reasons why, no note, nothing – she had taken me in with out a seconds thought. I had loved her for that more than anyone on this earth.

And she was always right. So I swallowed my pride and turned back to Casper.

“You’re pissed I didn’t bow aren’t you?”

“Don’t be silly.” His lips made the words, but his tone disagreed. So, grimacing slightly, I bowed in front of him. As I got up I swear I swore he was trying to wipe the smile off his face.

“Ok. Now the niceties are done, time to teach you. How much do you know about Venatorians?”

I shrugged. Grandma had never told me much. But she’d brought me a book about them, an old leather binded huge hard back.  I was sure it was still substituting for my broken desk leg.

He rubbed his face with his hand and dropped onto the desk behind him.

“The Venatorians are one of the oldest races, although very few humans realise we even exist. Unlike humans – who think they are civilised – we don’t resist the basic animal urge to hunt. Although many humans will say they would never kill, they are lying. Almost all the food they eat was killed and the amount of murders each year investigated by their police disagrees with the morals they pretend to hold.

“We are more civilised, because we let out our urges and needs in small bite size moments that are neither detected nor excessive.”

            His voice and his eyes were so intense, I forced myself to sit, my legs shaking from under me.

            “Venatorians have existed no longer than humans, but we have evolved rapidly to use full advantage of our animal feelings and our superior brains. We eat only when we need to. We do not hunt for sport or pleasure. Our prey is just that; prey.”

            I nodded, compelled by the seriousness in his voice.

            “We are clever enough to not leave a trail and very few humans have discovered us. If trails are not left, they can not be picked up. But you must be careful young one,”

            I pushed back the annoyance at hearing him use that phrase. He was, after all, not anything like Viator.

            “You must be careful who you pick to feed from. You must always have a reason. Erratic and random selection will not save you from prying eyes, only leave your plans sloppy and traceable.”

            I was watching his eyes, taking in every word. I felt glamoured and compelled by him, stuck to my chair.

            “Some pick the stupid humans, to cull out the population that is not needed. Others pick humans that live alone, less chance of a missing persons form. But no matter who you choose or how you choose, you must have a reason. A reason will keep you focused on your goal.”

            “How often will I need to feed?” I asked, my voice shaking a little.

            “It changes. New borns like yourself will need to feed much more regularly that an elder. An elder can last 20 years without a new meal. A new born can not go much more than a few weeks in the beginning. In the old days, an elder would catch the new born the prey, their experience shinning through and saving the trouble of police or human involvement. Now, they prefer the new borns to learn with the guidance of a more experienced Venatorian. But there are two rules you must always observe.

“1, No one must ever know you are Venatorian that isn’t.”

“And 2, no one escapes. If you are weak enough to let a human go or slip through your fingers, you will suffer the consequences.”

            As his gaze broke from mine, I started to regret not reading that book.

            “Has your Grandmother furnished you with one of these?” As if reading my mind, Casper held up the hardback book. A Venatorian guide to hunting

          I nodded.

            “I want you to bring it to our next meeting. There is plenty in there that can save you the trouble of trying to listen to me. We will go through it slowly together.”

            “How long before I can hunt?”

            He sighed, running a hand through his hair, making his fringe stand on end. “Viator said it was up to me, but I don’t believe you will be ready for a good month or two.”

            “Then how will I feed?”

            “I will hunt for you. Bring you back my kills.”

            As he turned his back to me to put the book in the desk drawer, I couldn’t help but feel a little let down. The main reason anyone became a Venatorian was to hunt. He was taking that from me already.

            “How do I interact with humans?” I asked, hoping I had phrased it right. His phrasing had made the explanation seem like poetry.

            “You act normal. No one, unless they are of our kinds offspring, may know what you are. You are easily followed; too vulnerable.”

            I stood up, spreading my legs a little to square up to him.

            “I am less vulnerable than you may think.”

            He stood and I ignored that he was much taller than me. “Do not threaten your teacher. Or he may just leave.”

            He patted my head and pushed passed me.

            I let out a long, frustrated breath. He was going to cause me untold annoyance. All I knew was I would be forced to study hard and get to the stage where I could hunt without him as soon as possible.

            As I walked down the road, the soft autumn breeze brushed my face. I didn’t feel different.

            After the burning pain had gone, after I’d pushed through it, it had been just like it was still me.

            Was I supposed to feel more animal? I wanted to ask Gran, but we’d never really talked about it. Could I trust my own image of her if I asked? Or would I regret doing it?

            I settled with just reading a bit of the book as I walked up my drive.

            Then it hit me. The iron smell hung in the air that had the night before. I could help but smile as I closed my eyes and took another deep breath.

            I was defiantly more animal. The smell of blood was making my mouth water and my stomach flipped.

            It got stronger as I walked into my grandma’s house.

            Laying on the floor was a few pieces of a man left and my grandma sat on the sofa, watching tv, nibbling on his arm, like it was the most normal thing ever.

THREE

“Gran?” Was all I could muster to say through my watering mouth and my confusion. Never had I seen a site like this, much less from my Grandmother.

            “Oh, hello Auda. Come, sit.” She gestured to the seat next to her with the hand that wasn’t occupied by a man-drumstick.

            “Gran, what’s going on?”

            “I thought I didn’t have to hide as much of this now you are officially one of us. That and I thought you’d be at your meeting longer.”

            I leaned back in the chair, trying to ignore my want for that blood.

            “There’s still a thigh left if you want it.” Gran pointed at the body with the arm she had in her hand, forcing it in front of me.

            It was like walking through a slaughter house and then being given complementary steaks.

            But the body was compelling me.

            “I’m ok thanks. I had a sandwich on the way home.” I lied. As Gran turned her attention back to the tv, I tried to think of how to word all the questions going through my head.     “Have you always done this Gran, when I’ve been out?”

            “No. Did Casper tell you how often we feed?”

            “Kind of. He brushed over it.”

            “Well, I only need to about once every 15 years. This is the first time I’ve done this since you’d been here.” She smiled and I pulled my eyes from the ligament hanging from her tooth.

            I glanced back over the body.

            “Who was he?”

            “Postman.” She stated, her attention back on the box. I looked over the room and found his bag of letters slung over the chair, a mug of coffee going cold on the dining room chair.

            “You sure you don’t want some honey. You’ll have to at some point.”

            “No thanks. I’ve got homework to do though. See you later.”

            As I made my way up stairs she called after me, “You want me to make dinner?”

            “No thanks.” I grimaced at the thought of eating after seeing the pulled apart torso downstairs. My Gran obviously embraced her animal side once in a while.

            I would have to do that bi-monthly to keep me going.

            I threw myself down on my bed. I reached to pull the book from under my desk, but the Untamed house of night book I’d been reading tempted me from the corner.

            Give me a chapter or two I thought to myself Then I’ll start studying.

About 3 hours later, I was so engrossed in what Zoey was doing; I barely heard my phone buzz on my desk.

            I forced myself up, walking past and ignoring the guide, and flipped it open.

            Bernice’s name flashed back at me. She’d been my best friend for about 4 years now. Her folks were also Venatorian and both sets of parents had been anxious to make us friends. At first, we had rebelled; ignoring each other and pushing each other in the playground for junior school.

            But when we went into secondary school, we quickly realised we were the only people we knew. And so we clung to each other.

            Venatorians were had to spot as well and as far as I knew, the whole school could have been like us. But the likelihood was that it was probably only a few, if that, and maybe the occasional teacher. We were a small, but powerful, race.

            I opened the text and smiled.

            ‘How did it go last night?’ She had sent, never one for text speak. She thought it was more personal and meant more if you took the time to write it all out.

            ‘Alright thanks, talk more at school tomorrow.’

            I shut the phone and plopped on the side of my bed. I wanted to tell her it all, make sure she knew the pain wouldn’t kill her if she tried hard enough. But Casper had made it clear. If she knows, it’s not her getting through it, but me.

            I managed to force myself off the bed and slowly dragged the guide out from under my desk, quickly replacing it with a wad of old school books.

            It was heavier than I remember. I had to blow a thick layer of dust, from the edges the desk hadn’t covered, off it before opening it.     

            The words were written like a dialect from hundreds of years ago, but I knew the words were English. As I struggled to understand it, I felt my mind wander off to the changes in the last few days.

            I’d turned 16, turned Venatorian and my Gran turn murderous on me.

            Well, not murderous. I just had never seen that side of her. She had always been one of those caring, kind old ladies. She doesn’t shout at young people, or feel the need to drive a car twice her size.

            Although I knew that our kind hunted, I never expected to see it like that. I thought it would be at least more civilised. And I thought that we were supposed to pick people the world wouldn’t miss. Surely Gran didn’t think much when she dragged the postman in for a cup of coffee and a nibble.

            I started to feel guilty as I thought this. Maybe I wasn’t giving Gran enough credit. I hadn’t eaten anything that could sustain me for little over a day. She’d been waiting 15 years. Maybe her first thought wasn’t “What would Auda think if she walked in now?”

            And I was earlier than I said I would be.

            Either I was making genuine points, or just trying to make excuses for the only family I knew anymore.

            Which ever on it was, it helped me feel better and soon I was curled up on my side, book still in my hand, fast asleep.

            I could always worry about it later.

Four

As I got up, the day before felt foggy. It was a blur of intense lectures and blood. Disappointment and logical thinking.

            Slowly, as I brushed my hair, my teeth, and got dressed, some of it came back to me. Casper’s stare as he explained our race and why we did what we did. And then my Gran’s lapse when I came in to see the torso soaking the carpet in blood.

            I shuddered at the image of my Gran holding his arm like a drumstick.

            Bracing myself, I paced down the stairs. I expected to see the coffee stale on the table, the bag still hanging there and blood staining the carpet.

            I saw none of it. You had to hand it to my Gran; she knew how to clean up.

            But, the twang of iron still hung in the air. It seemed sweet now, like chocolate melted on strawberries. The best product in the world spilled over a juicy fruit.

            My mouth watered so much I had to use the back of my thumb to wipe some away. I ran to the window and throw it open.

            “You ok Auda?” Gran turned into the room and looked at me worriedly.

            I swallowed my own spit in time to nod and say, “I can still smell the blood.”

            “Oh sorry darling. I forgot new borns were more sensitive to this kind of thing.”  She still seemed like my Gran, no piece of man to be seen on her. “Are you sure you’re ok?”

            I tried to release my tense body as I rubbed a hand over my face.

            “Just tired.” I lied.

            “Well, you better get to school. Bernice will be waiting for you wont she?”

            I smiled and pushed past her, grabbing my school bag and trying not to look like I was glad to get out of there.

            It still didn’t feel right. I wanted to be alright, to see yesterday as nothing and just move on.            

            As I pushed back the guilt for wanting the blood that much, Bernice bounded up to me.

            “Hello there little missy.” She smiled, her voice laced with her usual optimism that I could even fake today.

            “Hey.”

            “So…”

            She stood in front of me, completely blocking my way, and annoying me slightly.

            “What Bernice?”

            “What was the initiation like? Was it like we thought it would be?” She returned to my side and carried on walking as she blabbered some more. “And Viator, what was he like? I bet he was all handsome and stuff, in an older man kind of way of course.”

            I just sighed and let her say something about how she’d seen him at a talk a few years ago.

            We were almost at the gate when she turned to me again.

            “So how was it?”

            “Weird.”

            A long moment lapsed as we stood, just watching each other. I could see the building annoyance in her as much as she could see it in me.

            “That’s it? Weird. That’s all I get?”

            “I can’t tell you much. It’s against the rules. You’re still 15 and-”

            Her long and loud sigh stopped my talking and I rolled my eyes.

            “15 this and 15 that. I’m more mature that half the 17 year old boys I know! It’s so not fair!” She pushed out her bottom lip.

            “And that makes you seem much more mature.”

            “You know what I mean Auda. There has to be a way you can tell me something.”

            “I can tell you Viator is like 7 foot tall.”

            She eyes lit up and I was confident this little nugget of information would keep her happy for a little while longer. 

            “That’s bigger than my Dad!”

            I rolled my eyes again as I pulled her into the playground, a dance my eyes did so many times a day it was hard to believe they hadn’t rolled back into my skull by now.

            Our school wasn’t very big, the buildings were small, but many, and the number of students was nothing to other local schools. But somehow I still found myself getting lost in it. I only really talked to Bernice, keeping myself to myself in most cases. There were a few people from my classes that would nod hi to me in the corridors, but I couldn’t name a single on of them.

            Teachers always gave me a good report, but none of them tried to get through to me on any level deeper than the work. I didn’t feel much inspiration, or praise, but I was fine with blending into the wood work.

            Bernice was not. She was always louder in class, making sure her opinion was heard, even when it was wrong. Not that it was a bad thing, she was loved by our class and her many other friends. It just wasn’t for me.

            “So you seriously can’t tell me anything else?” She asked again. I shook my head and it looked like she was going to sulk again. “That sucks.”

            I nodded. It did suck. I wanted to warn her to tell her that the pain was not going to hurt her forever. However much it hurt her, to overcome it felt ten times better.

            It was something she had to overcome on her own, but the thought of her dying because she wasn’t prewarned, the thought of losing the only link with the human world I had left, it was crushing.

            I also couldn’t help but think, as I walked to my tutor alone, this was too much responsibility for a 16 year old to carry. To keep these secrets, to get used to this new lifestyle and feeding patterns.

            Did I just think ‘feeding pattern’? That was so totally not alright.

            I sighed as I sat down in my seat at the back corner. I couldn’t help but look out and wonder if any of them were Venatorian like me. 

            I had to get out my head. I settled with jumping into Dickens’ for a while.

            As Pip ran through my mind, he pushed all the worry to the corners and scared away the fears.

            I was alright… for a little while longer anyway.

            But anything could happen tomorrow.

Five

A few days later, I had to meet Casper again.

            I really didn’t want to. He made me feel like a small child; a stupid small child.

            I knocked on the door to the bright room and it opened on its own accord. He was sitting at the desk, scribbling something.

            “Take a seat.” He stated without looking up. “We will start in a minute.”

            I did as I was told and pulled up a chair. As time passed, I looked around the room. I hadn’t really taken it in before.

            I was painted with the kind of vicious cream that reflected the light enough to be bright white. Individual tables were set out with chairs like an American class room. Behind Casper’s desk was a large back board, with yellow chalk in the tray beneath. But nothing was written on it. The floor was only work looking floor boards.

            “Auda.” I looked up and realised Casper had been watching me watching the floor. I tried not to blush. “Have you got that book we discussed?”

            I nodded and pulled it out of my bag. He smiled quickly, before coming out from his desk and turning round the chair in front of me. Soon we were both sitting at the same table, fit for only one.

            “This will take you long to read through and for me to teach. To thoroughly understand this, we could be having bi-weekly sessions for months.”

            I tried not to frown. I wanted to sulk like Bernice then. Despite my efforts, I think he realised my disappointment.

            “Do you have a problem with my teaching?”

            “No.” I said a little too quickly.

            “Then, its just me as a person.”

            I shook my head viciously but he chuckled slightly.

            “Chapter one.” He threw open the huge book. “Body changes.” He stated. I noticed him sift in his chair. This was sounding a little too much like a puberty talk.

            “Being Venatorian means more than just mental changes.” He was reading from the book, about as uncomfortable as he could be. That relaxed me a little.

            “You will grow stronger in body as well. You’ll find your strength double. This is can be hard to grasp at first, but it will be easier to manage as time passes.”

            He looked up to me and I smiled.

            “Let’s try that shall we?” Casper asked, getting to his feet. I did too. “Pick me up.”

            “What? Don’t be silly.”

            “Pick me up.” He stated again. “I’m guessing by our frame, if you were human, this would be an impossible task,” Was that pride I saw in his eyes? Proud that he was too huge for me? “But you are not human. Try it.”

             I sighed. Slowly, I bent down to put an arm behind his legs and one around his shoulders. Soon, I was holding him off the ground. Of course it was still a strain; I was not completely changed yet.

            As I shook a little, he jumped from my arms.

            “Good. But you are still a little weak.” Casper walked to his desk and pulled a plastic bag out of the drawer. He threw it to me and it took me seconds to realise what it was.

            I pulled out the fried chicken and sunk my teeth in.

            “The meat will keep you going. Its best, when you are as new as you are, to try to slowly introduce the new meals. No raw meat for a while.”

            I was too busy filling my body with the greasy goodness to do anything but nod.

            He sat back at the desk and I sat opposite him. The longer I was forced to spend with him, the less his first impression stuck in my head.

            Maybe he wasn’t all too bad. And just maybe he wasn’t arrogant, only wiser than I was.

            “Will you stop making so much noise?” He sighed. “It’s only chicken for god’s sake.”

            Or maybe he was just as irritating as I thought.

            “I will eat how I want to eat.” I smiled a big smile and deliberately made more noise.

            Childish, but satisfying none the less.

            He carried on reading from the book. “Also due to your now animal instincts, you will find that your body will need meat and it will long for blood.”

            I sat up and stopped eating as quickly.

            “The smallest hint of blood in the air and you will want it. This bloodlust is strong but you must not be weak enough to let it control you.”

            He looked up to me and I looked at the table.

            “You’ve experienced this already?” He sound confused.

            “My Gran fed the other day.”

            “Did you eat any of the meat?” His words were quick and urgent.

            “No.” I caught his eye, trying to look as confused as I felt. “Why?”

            “Casper?” A voice popped around the door. “Viator is on line one for you.”

            “Thank you. Excuse me Auda.”

            He got off his seat and pulled the phone up quickly. “Yes sir... of course... any day now... why?... no, I completely understand... she’s doing fine.” He looked up to me. “...yes sir.” He put down the phone.

            “What was that about?”

            “Nothing important. I think that concludes our session for today.”

            I couldn’t help but wonder what he had talked about on the phone as I walked home. It was obvious it was me they were talking about. But why? Viator had many new borns to worry about.

            I also couldn’t quite understand why Casper had been so quick to make sure I hadn’t eaten any of the meat my Gran had hunted.

            I was slowly realising that I was not going to enjoy my time with him one bit.

            As my hand hovered over the front door handle, my mind shot out one thought before I could stop it.

            Please don’t let there be a body.

Six

I paced myself down the street, heading for the coffee shop that me and Bernice always met at. The autumn weather was still not playing fair and I had to hold my coat closed.

            Soon, I found myself in the warm of the shop. Smiling, I walked up to the counter and ordered my usual hot chocolate and muffin. It seemed weird to be doing these simple human tasks.

            As I sat at our spot by the window, the perfect place to watch people walk past, I glanced over the rest of the people in the shop.

            Some sitting with laptops, others on their phones, a couple falling in love. If they knew I could crush all of them, they wouldn’t have been smiling as much. That thought lead me on to wonder if I could. I knew physically I could, but mentally, would I be able to crush a shop full of people, feed, and go about my day.

            I was already thinking about how I could do it. A quick run to the door and I could bolt it shut; the windows were tinted from the outside, so no one would see. I would be able to break at least two necks without causing too much fuss. But then of course, the weaker of the humans would start screaming and soon I would have to silence them.

            What if there were Venatorians in there with me? Would they join sides with me and feed too? Or would they see reason and stop me?

            I wasn’t strong enough to fight a Venatorian even if I could kill a shop full of humans.

            I realised I was gripping my plate a little too much and my knuckles were going white. Maybe it was time to get that off my mind. Never once before have I sat with my muffin and considered murder.

            But then again, there is a first time for everything.

            Bernice bounced in from the wind and smiled at me, gesturing towards the line. I watched as she got her food and coffee and came towards me.

            “Hey.”

            “Hi.” She sat across from me and started to people watch immediately. I picked at my muffin and joined in.

            “What’s new then?” I asked, trying to start a conversation to take my mind off wondering how many of the people walking around today were like me and how many were breakable.

            “Oh, Viator set a date for my initiation.”

            I smiled. Before I had been worried about her, but I knew she was strong. And the sooner she became Venatorian the sooner we could discuss the murderous thoughts.

            “That’s great. When?”

            “Exactly a week.” She beamed before take a long sip of her coffee. “It is going to be amazing.”

            I pushed back the urge to warn her again and nodded. “You’ll defiantly never forget it.” I looked back out the window.        

            “I want you to be there.” She watched me as I slowly turned my head back, putting down my hot chocolate and leaning back in my chair.

            “I don’t know Bernice-”

            “Please Auda. I need a friendly face there. They said I could bring one person. Mum and Dad won’t go for some unknown reason.”

            I knew the reason. They didn’t want to watch their daughter writhing in pain with no way to stop it. It was the same reason I was hesitant. As well as, I had brought my Gran and she was no comfort. She wasn’t allowed to be. The blank faces were to hide the fear everyone feels for the new born.

            I would have to do that too.

            “I’ll think about it.”

            She smiled for a little while, returning to her cake. The truth was, as much as I wanted my best friend to be like me, to tell her everything and have her tell me she was feeling the same and I wasn’t becoming some kind of monster, I wanted to remain ignorant to how she got like that. I wasn’t sure how much of her initiation I would be able to watch without the overwhelming urge to help her.

            We filled the rest of the conversation with meaningless chatter, discussing the latest music and the good looking men that walked past the shop. It felt almost like before. I wondered how much of this would change if – no, when – she changed too. She spent most of the conversation tapping against her mug with her long fingernails. A trait most people found annoying, but I had become almost immune too.

            Hugging goodbye, I let her humanness wash over me without thinking about how easily I could grip a little harder and kill her.

            I walked back the way I had come, a darkness and heaviness to my step that hadn’t been there before.

            As I was trying to get the idea of murder out my head, I felt a sweet smell linger in my nostrils and float into my head.

            Meat.

            Not raw meat. Not ‘just-been-sliced-postman’ meat. The butchers across the road called to me, its lingering sent making my mouth water again; only this time I could control it.

            I didn’t even think as I crossed the road. My body needed it and that was all I knew.

            “6 sausages.” I smiled to the aging man across the counter, stabbing the glass with my finger.

            He handed me the bag and I handed the money in return. In that moment I realised my smile was a little too wide, a little too big for an everyday purchase.

            Toning down my smile, I left the shop and quickly found an alley around where they would deliver the new meat.

            I didn’t want to hide away, but it would seem a little unusual for a teenage girl to be eating raw sausages in the middle of the street.

            As the soft, tenderised protein spread across my mouth, I burst out in the biggest, more genuine smile I’d ever wore. I’d had meat before, but now it was sweet. I knew that my taste was getting more precise as I could taste the iron lined in it that humans would never notice.

            As I swallowed the last one, I wiped my face. My mouth was watering still, like after you have filled your mouth with sherbet.

            I tried to walk back out of the alley like a normal person. Suddenly, I felt guilt settling in my stomach.

            That bothered me all the trip home. Why was I guilty? I had been humane. I could of kill anyone in either shop, instead I settled with sausages.

            The more I though it through, the stronger the feeling got.

            It hit me. I was guilty because I felt like I was going against Gran. As crazy as it seemed, she had shown herself to me for the first time that day I had seen her feeding. She had felt so comfortable with it.

            And I had just shoved 6 sausages down my throat in the shadows.

            I was not going to make a good Venatorian.

Seven

Bernice’s initiation was tomorrow. And that was all I could think as I walked to the building that held Casper’s room. It had been an old abandoned school till Viator convinced the local council that we would be peaceful to use it. Or course he didn’t tell them what we were, but he said we were part of a teaching organisation.

            They sucked it up. What with the charisma Viator had and the money he paid each month for the privilege, they were more than happy to oblige.

            So now, as I climbed the stairs to Casper’s room, I felt like I was back at school.

            Taking in a deep breath, I turned into Casper’s room. Viator stood in front of his desk, leaning back slightly. A relax stance I’d never known he could take up.

            “Viator.” I bowed slightly and he nodded. I took a scan of the room; a nervous glance that didn’t go unnoticed.

            “Casper has been taken off this job.”

            My eyes shot back to him. “Why?” I snapped without thinking, then immediately double back on myself. “Why sir?”

            “Casper is a... threat to our survival. He was taken out of his powerful position.”

            I watched Viator’s eyes. He was too comfortable for my liking.

            “If you may excuse my curiosity, what threat did he pose?”

            “Curiosity is dangerous young one.” Viator pushed off from the table and walked towards me. “You must be careful Auda.” He placed a hand to the side of my face.

            He was watching my eyes. Searching for something in me. But whatever he wanted, I didn’t have because he realised my face and walked towards the door.

            “You will be given to a new mentor. If you will follow me.”

            He opened the door and stood waiting for me. Quickly I followed through, walking down the corridor in complete silence. I could feel his power radiating across the hall to me.

            We soon came to another room, which he opened with his extended arm, but stayed outside to let me in first. He was an old fashioned gentleman.

            “Gran?” I was a little shocked to see my Grandmother sitting behind the desk.

            “Your Grandmother is one of our finest.”

            I looked back to see Viator looking a little too intensely at my Gran.

            Old people infatuation. Ew.

            “She will teach you all you need to know.” He turned to me this time.

            I nodded and bowed again slightly. Viator smiled before looking back at my Gran. A different look this time, a secretive look.

            I shook off this look as Viator left and Gran’s smile warmed.

            “Hello sweetie.”

            I admit it was a little awkward as I sat on the desk opposite. As I played with the edges of my sleeves, Gran finished the scribbling on the form she was writing before we came in.

            She put down her pen and looked to me.

            “I hope you don’t mind. I heard about Casper and realised that it would be easier for me to teach you.”

            “Why was Casper taken off Gran?”

            She shook her head a little. “I’m not sure. Don’t want to furnish you will the wrong information.”

            I knew that tone although she thought I didn’t. She was lying to me.

            But she always had her reasons, so I left it this time.

            “Where did Casper leave off?” Gran sat forward and took the book from my out stretched hand.

            “He only got to chapter one.”

            She nodded. “Chapter two.” She read. “Powers.” She paused for a second. “Would you mind if I told you about it, rather than read.”

            I shook my head and leaned forward in my chair.

            “Right. Some new borns can form powers. As we change, energy is converted and changed in our body as well. Some of this energy can be converted and links with our strongest traits and abilities when we were human.”

            She paused and I took it as a sign to ask for more.

            “Can I have an example?”

            “My grandmother used to be able to read people very well. So as she became one of our kind, she gained the power to read people’s minds. It was very useful for hunting. She was able to hear where her prey was hiding and if they were going to fight back. But it also meant that she could scout out other of her kind to help her.”

            “What if you don’t have an outstanding human ability?”

            “Some new borns never get anything. I myself, although most of my family did, never got one. But for others, it’s a hidden ability. For example, some new borns have the ability to imprint. They can change the mind of a person they are attracted too. Some use it just for sexual attraction but most will use it to make the other person fall in love with them.

            “But saying all of this, there are the occasional new borns that have physical powers. Or the few whose senses are made stronger by their change very rarely get noticed. The change from human to Venatorian makes all the sense stronger, so the new born doesn’t usually realise it alone.”

            “That’s where the mentor comes in?” I asked. Gran nodded.

            She took a glance at the time. “The session is over.” I didn’t realise how long it had been till I looked back myself. “I have some paperwork to catch up on.”

            “I’ll set off then.”

            I stood, pulling my book from her desk.

            As I got to the door, Gran called my name. Swivelling back to her, she was looking at me more intensely. “Have you thought anymore about Bernice’s initiation?” She looked a little worriedly at me.

            I took a deep breath and felt it was better to let my heart answer by instinct.

            “Yes. I’m going. Maybe you could take me there when you go?”

            She nodded but I could see the annoyance in her eyes. She didn’t want me to go. But as much as I knew it would hurt me to see her suffer, I knew it would hurt our friendship a lot more if I didn’t. And if she... didn’t make it through, I would never forgive myself if I wasn’t there to see her one last time.

            My hands were tied.

Eight

It was the day of Bernice’s initiation. All the day, she was blabbering excitedly about it, barley listening to a teacher. I was trying to hide the knot in my stomach and the unnerving feeling that something was bound to go wrong.

            But to be fair, that was the same feeling I’d had before mine.

            As the day dragged on, I realised how human she really was. She interacted with the human world so well. I couldn’t help but wonder what she would be like as one of us. Would she be as murderous as us, or would she retain more of her human side than I was?

            School ended quickly and Bernice bounced off home. I was still on the edge. That might be the last time I saw her happy, the last time I had a conversation with her.

            I forced those thoughts to the back of my head. I couldn’t think like that. Maybe Bernice wasn’t as strong as me, but she was strong. She had to make it though.

Night drew in and soon I was steeping out of my Gran’s car. The cold air showed signs of winter coming.

            “Are you sure you want to be here?” Gran looked worriedly at me. A look I couldn’t stand anyone I cared about to have for me.

            My mouth said yes, but my mind struggled. I had to be here, but I didn’t want to be.

            The circle of people were almost exactly as I remembered them. Gran took her place and I slipped in beside her.

            Bernice was shoved into the middle of the circle and her helpless look reminded me of the total darkness I had seen at first. We must have had better night vision, because I could see the faces on each person in the circle so clearly, the blank stares that were only occasionally injected with emotion.

            The lights whirled to live and shone down on us all. It took my eyes only a few seconds to adjust to it.

            As Bernice caught my gaze, she beamed, I kept my face straight. I tried to ignore the confusion spreading its way across her face.

            “Young one.” Viator stepped into the circle, demanding the same respect he had before. “You are of the age. You will be initiated tonight, like I was, like my elders were and like everyone in this circle was.”

            These words sounded too familiar. Only this time the light was already on when he spoke. Was that wrong timing?

            The same red robe hung from his frame and his smile was still as warm and comforting. I watched as she took it in. Everyone could tell her respected him, probably more than I had at the time.

“Embrace the light my dear child. Feel it fill you. It will be the element that guides you for your life. Showing you the path to take.”

            She reacted different to this than I had. She spun around in circles, the light bouncing off her hair and lip gloss. A wide smile was plastered on her face and I was glad she didn’t know what was coming. If she didn’t make it, I would cling to the image of her in that second.

            Viator carried on talking and I realised, he’d either done this so many times and had found the right words, or this was scripted. Viator was the narrator in this sick, twisted play.

            Soon, my Gran walked forward with a silver gauntlet and handed it to an even more confused Bernice.

            “One thing separates us from the common animal. Animals hunt for food or warmth, but they do not remember or even care that they have done it. We hunt, but we will remember each one, connect with each one.”

            A man was pushed into the centre of the circle and she lowered down to him. She was warm as she looked at him.

            “Shh, calm down.” She took his hand and looked deep into his eyes.

            “Don’t let them kill me.” He whispered. “Please.”

            I could see the pity in her eyes, and it was leaking. I think the man saw these tears as humanity. I saw it was crying the rest of her humanity out.

            Instead of grabbing the knife, she placed her hand on the side of the man’s face, letting it slip down till his nails were just placed next to his neck.

            I saw what was coming. He didn’t.

            She pressed deeper and the blood spurted from his neck. She collected it quickly in the gauntlet as I wondered if she knew she’d hit the biggest vein, or if she just wanted blood.

            Viator smiled as she returned the gauntlet to him and he spiked it the same way he had for mine.

            I took a step back as she drank, knowing I would want to burst forward at any moment.

            I held in a sob as she fell to her feet, gagging. Gran held my arm. I couldn’t tell if she was trying to comfort or restrain me.

            Bernice fell forward on to her front and I felt a tear break from my eye. She had to get up, she had to.

            That’s all I was thinking. She had to get up, she was going to be alright. But I couldn’t stop the tears. It took all my energy not to run forward and to keep my crying silent.

            Crying was weakness.

            Viator knelt beside Bernice and I swore mine hadn’t taken this long.

            He placed a hand on the top of her head. “Young Bernice. You must remember the light will guide you.”

            She nodded with what energy she had left. Suddenly, a groan erupted from inside her, a wounded but very strong groan.

            She was getting up!

            After she took a few shaky breaths, Viator continued. “As you may not know little one, that liquid changed you, you are now one of us. If your body rejected it, or your mind was not strong enough, you would have died.”

            She looked terrified. I watched as Viator explained about her mentoring, but told her she would have to wait to get one. “In the mean time,” He pointed to me “Auda will fill you in with her knowledge.”

            I bowed to him and beamed at my friend.

            She was going to be like me.

            But probably with less murder thoughts… I could only hope.

Nine

I didn’t get a chance to talk to Bernice after the initiation so I couldn’t wait for school the next day.

            Slowly, I walked through the gates, worried already that she hadn’t met me one the way here already. I scanned the area.

            I spotted her, leaning against a wall. Her posture was all wrong. She looked like she was lacking in energy, like the wall was physically holding her up.

            I braced myself as I walked over to her.

            “Hey Bernice.” I tried to inject some of Bernice’s signature bounciness into my speech.

            She looked at me, but she made it seem that even that was too much effort. “Hi.” Not a single tone of happiness was used and even the edges of her mouth lifted.

            “Are you ok?”

            “Yes.”

            Something wasn’t right. She was too quick, too precise to be Bernice. If she hadn’t reacted to her name, I would have been sure I’d got the wrong person and just kept walking.

            We took a seat on a smaller part of the wall but she kept her head looking down at her hands. I’d never seen her so subdued. She didn’t look depressed or upset. She just looked calm. A look that didn’t suit her.

            “How did you feel last night went then?”

            This time her eyes shot to mine with an intensity that I didn’t know they could hold.

            “It was... liberating. I no longer feel the need to live up to petty human standards. I don’t have to feel like one of them, I am better.”

            Unnerved, I tried to smile a little.

            Admittedly, I believed I was stronger than humans, but I wouldn’t have described it as better. Yes, I was free of the pressures to fit in – but I hadn’t been aware Bernice had felt that – but it didn’t mean I was better.

            Craving meat every second of the day couldn’t have been considered better? Surely?

            I thought about it the whole way to class. What made one race better than another?

            Intelligence? If so then we would win every time.

            But what if it was something like empathy? What if putting yourself in someone else’s shoes made you a better ...person?

            If so, we were screwed.

Since I’d changed, I’d be stuck in a routine of school, Gran and Bernice. I decided I had to get out of the house. As broke as I was, I walked around the town centre for a good few hours, buying nothing, browsing everything.

            I didn’t hurt to see what I could have got if I’d had the money.

            I was walking up towards star bucks when I felt like someone’s eyes were on me. I couldn’t describe it but it wasn’t like when you can feel a teacher’s presence looking at you when you’re talking, or when you feel like someone’s following you. It was as if someone was looking at me, and my subconscious was reacting and replying.

            I spun around a few times, ignoring the fact that I must have look like such an idiot, but no one walking either side of me was the person. Although they were all looking at me now of course.

            I took a second to calm down; a few deep breaths and I would carry on walking.

            In a split-second I saw him and my stomach jumped.

            He was sitting in the starbucks, his hands tightly around a mug, staring out at me. His deep blue eyes seemed to glance over me while one of his hands ran through his short dark hair.

            I was mesmerised. Not by his looks, although for a while I thought it was, but by the way he was looking at me, so intently. Like he knew me from somewhere, but couldn’t place me.          

            Soon it became unnerving as he didn’t look away and I forced myself to break the gaze and carry on walking. I told myself I was being silly. He was probably just starting at me after I spun around in circles on the path.

            But, as I came back from boots having scanned all the make-up and deciding on only a bottle of water, I felt it again, behind me. There was this burning in me to turn around, an urge I could neither understand nor control.

            As I spun round to him, he was starting at me intensely again but this time, a small smile danced at the corners of his mouth.

            I couldn’t help but smile back a little, before I realised it.

            I shook it off again and carried on walking home. That had never happened before, I had never felt so… connected with a complete stranger.

            Of course, if I had known he wouldn’t have been a stranger for long, I would have understood better.

Ten

Gran called me into the living room as I came through the door.

            “Honey, I want to have a session with you know.”

            As I walked in, I felt my legs were weak already. I needed more meat, and soon. Gran was sitting on her sofa, her legs up beside her.

            “Yes Gran.”

            She gestured to the arm chair and I sat down.

            “I want to talk to you about hunting.” I nodded. “Soon, you will need to hunt and I want to prepare you as much as possible. So, today, I will help you hunt.”

            “Really? But Casper said-”

            “Ignore what Casper said.” She snapped. A few seconds later she had regained her temper and smiled again. “I am teaching you know, and you must learn to hunt.”

            I nodded again, not used to my Gran snapping and consequently silent.

            “We shall order in a pizza and then we shall ask him in for a quick drink. I will teach you not only how to lure them, but how to make it last, as you are so young and could feed off the same human for a few weeks.”

            I felt sick I must admit. The image of it made me want to hurl. But then, as the thought of the blood slipped into my mind, it started to seem more and more appetising.

            Gran picked up the phone and handed it to me. “Get a meaty one.”

            I took it, shaking a little but with a watering mouth.

            “Hello. How can I help?”

            “Hi. I would like to order a pizza.”  

            “That’s why we’re here honey.” The woman’s voice had a southern American accent, twanging some of the letters. “What kind y’all want?”

            “Whichever one has the most meat.”

            “Can do.”

            I gave her my address and she gave me a time. I tried to stay pleasant as I said goodbye to her and stifled the urge to tell her to make sure the delivery guy was careful.

            Me and Gran sat on the sofa waiting and as time passed, I could feel myself getting slowly weaker and weaker. The prospect of food had made me want it so badly.

            As the bell went, I rushed to follow Gran to the door.

            “One meat feast pizza?” The man stood, smiling at us, blissfully unaware of what was to come.

            “Oh yes, thank you.” Gran took it with an even bigger smile and a slightly flirty tone of voice I had never seen her use. Instead of being grossed out, like the young man should have been, he giggled!

            I took a step back as she invited him in. He looked back at his car.

            “I really shouldn’t. I have quite a few other deliv-” He looked back and caught my Gran’s eye.

            “Just a drink. Please?”

            He nodded and followed her in.

            He sat in the living room as Gran dragged me through to the kitchen.

            “Liking my power?” She asked with a cheeky grin. I looked at her, a little confused still.       “I can… entice men. Started off great as a young new born. Its never left me.” I loved the proud look on her face. I smiled back at her, unable to grasp words for this moment.

            Quickly, but not quickly enough, Gran plopped something into his coffee. She must have know I’d noticed when I looked up at her.

            “I told you I’d tell you how to make it last. This is a drug, I forget the name, that makes humans drowsy and fall asleep but is out of the system in just half an hour. Great for us.”

            Without another word, Gran grasped the hot drinks and started towards the living room. I was curious, I couldn’t help that, but I was also wondering how many innocent men my Gran had taken using her power. How many of them had wanted something from her, and just got eaten?

            I watched as Gran charmed his so more, his eyes glazing over as she spoke, taking small sips of his coffee.

            All I could do was wait. Wait for the moment he would drop off to sleep, wait for Gran to tell me what to do.

            Of course, my luck and all, I was out of the room making myself a drink when he finally dozed off. I came in while Gran was folding his legs to his chest.

            “Help me than Auda.”

            I took his arms as we carried him up stairs and too the room at the end of the hall.

            To understand the significance of this, you have to understand that I have never been in this room. If I was playing so much as too near it, Gran was shoo me away. I had never even had the guts to touch the door handle.

            Now Gran was swinging the door open. I bundled the delivery man in first, before I took a scan of it.

            The walls were a boring, but bright shade of grey. In the middle sat a sturdy looking metal chair, almost like one they used to kill off criminals. The floor was grey as ell, tiled and smooth. In the corners were cameras like CCTV ones, little red lights flashing.

            Gran tied the delivery man to the chair.

            “He’ll be asleep for about another hour. Come with me.” I followed her through, what I first thought was a wall, but it was a door cleverly hidden.

            Inside was a smaller room, packed with a row of computer screens. It took me a second to realise each was an angle of the room we had just been in. 4 I knew were the cameras I saw, but there must have been more hidden as about 15 other pictures were being broadcasted.

            I must admit, I looked a little dumbfounded when Gran turned to me.

            “Don’t look at me like that Auda. All these years and you didn’t think I would have a fool proof system.”

            I took another glance over the room. Not like this I didn’t.

            “Right Auda.” Gran took a seat on the small swivel chair in the corner. “You need to learn to snack. If you gorge on him you will be satisfied, yes, but you will want more quickly. The more people you kill, the more likely you are to be found out.”

            I nodded.

            “So, you start small. Start with fingers or toes, but keep him alive. Meat that is fresh is so much better.” She stood close to me, taking my shoulder in her hands and I realised I’d been swaying.

            “You may not know this, but our saliva after we change has a clotting agent in it that works on both humans and Venatorians. This will seal the wound and make sure the human doesn’t feel a thing. This human will also feel less pain because he’s been glamoured by me, but when you catch on your own, unless you have this power, you will have to be careful the level of pain you submit them too.”

            I nodded and Gran let go of me. I was feeling slightly light headed. But I took a deep breath and Gran pushed me out into the other room.

            He was still sound asleep. I knelt quietly too the floor and separated his little finger from the others carefully.

            As I placed my teeth around it, I braced myself. I wasn’t sure what this was going to be like.

            Clenching down, it didn’t take much pressure with my teeth to take it clean off. He squirmed slightly in his chair. I remembered what Gran had said and moved the finger into my hand to lick the wound clean.

            I watched as not only the blood formed a clot, but the skin slowly grew back over where his finger had been. I had to admit; that freaked me a little.

            I looked down at the missing finger in my hand and tried not to smile too much as the blood was pooling in my palm.

            I licked at the end of the finger and the blood exploded in my mouth. I had tasted it as I bit it off but my mind was so focused on getting him to stay asleep, I hadn’t registered it.

            The sweet taste of the blood moved around my mouth, hitting every taste bud. I couldn’t help myself as I put my lips to the end of the finger and slowly started to suck the blood out of it. As it flowed down my throat I felt a buzz hit my head. I no longer cared how I looked to Gran watching, or when she would come in. All I could focus on was the taste, so sweet.

            As I dehydrated the finger, I started to eat the flesh like it was a barbecue rib, stripping bits of flesh from the bone with so much ease.

            It was almost a relief when Gran stopped me just before I was going to lick the bone clean. And it was only when she dragged me into the other room that I had eaten the nail too. My stomach turned.

            Maybe I wasn’t cut out for this.

Eleven

I stood and stared myself down in the mirror for a good ten minutes the next morning.

            Usually I couldn’t look at myself for more than 10 seconds, but this wasn’t to check my makeup, or make sure my outfit looked alright.

            I was looking for something else. I was looking for a single surviving shred of humanity. For some reason I thought if I could find it anywhere, my eyes would hold it.

            But if it was there, I couldn’t see it, and soon Gran was calling me to go to school.

            After the 5 failed attempt to convince me to eat from the delivery guy – that Gran had glamoured again to keep him from trying to escape and realising the missing finger – she let me go and I was glad of the escape.

            It wasn’t escaping from Gran, but I had gone too far last night. Too much in too little time and it had scared me.

            I had lost control. And I couldn’t let myself do that again.          

            I was also, now more than ever, worried about going to school. Rooms and rooms filled with warm beating hearts and blood ready to slide down my throat effortlessly towards my stomac-

            I forced my mind off that. If I imagined my class as food, I wouldn’t make it through the day without a murder or two and I would defiantly be found.

            And possibly labelled crazy for chewing on Mr Rush’s head.

            The day dragged on as I forced out the taste of blood from my head and tried to ignore that me and Bernice could quickly break the necks of the whole class.

            So, in true teenage girl style, I decided to keep my mind off death by thinking about a guy. Well, the guy to be precise.

            Sam Smith had been my crush for as long as I could remember. I don’t know if it was his dusty blonde hair, or his piercing green eyes, but I couldn’t help myself. We used to spend all our time together in infant school but slowly grew apart as we got older.

            He took on his football and the popularity of the whole school. I became the girl in the shadows, barely discernable from the other girls in our year.

            Of course to start with, we had still been close, seeing each other out side of school. But after a while we both realised it was just too much effort to try and keep the friendship up. So we stopped seeing each other.

            Well, he stopped seeing me. I still saw him everywhere.

            So today, when I saw him standing by the English room, with a new burst of confidence I hadn’t known I’d had, I ignored his friends and walked up to him.

            “Sam Smith?” I asked with fake surprise in my voice.

            After a second of him searching my face, he smiled. “Auda! Hey.” He moved away from his horde of other men. “Give me a sec guys.” He shouted after us and walked me to the front entrance of the school.

            “How have you been?” I asked, not being able to stop smiling, but surprised I was talking too coherently to him.

            “I’ve been good. You?”

            “Yeah thanks.”

            As strange as it sounded, it felt normal. Like I should have done this so long ago. As we sat down on the small section of wall, I wanted to hug him.     

            “Hey, you know this school dance their trying to organise?”

            “What, after that bunch of kids went on a picket march?” I nodded. “Yeah, was silly that wasn’t it.”

            “Defiantly, but its worth a couple of kids pride to get the whole school together.” He nodded this time and I wondered if he knew where I was going with this. “Would you want to go together, for old times sakes.”

            I watched him hesitate for a moment and I knew what he was thinking. ‘Do I want to be seen with her in front of everyone’ and I couldn’t blame him.

            So it shocked me even more when he nodded.

            “Sounds cool to me. See you there.” He smiled and stood up, patting my head with his hand the way he had started doing ever since he grew taller an me in year 3.

            I stood and suddenly realised my legs had gone weak.

            Trust him.

            There was only 3 days till the dance, so I managed to fill my head for the next few lessons with ideas for outfits. Luckily they hadn’t added any silly dress themes.

The night of the dance, Bernice sat at my head board, watching me throw all my clothes out, looking for something.

            “I will say again. Just once more. I am not going.” Bernice played with her fingernails as I sighed.

            “You have to come, you’re my moral support.”

            “I’m weak.” She stated quietly.

            “Hang on a sec.” I darted dowstairs and pulled a fresh chicken breast that Gran had brought when I would only take a little bit more of the delievery man – who was still tied up in the room.

            I almost threw it at her when I came in.

            “Eat that and then you’re coming with me!”

Twelve

It didn’t matter how many times Bernice told me I looked fine, I still played with the ends of my sleeves nervously. I hadn’t realised how much this had meant to me till I’d left the house. Now there was no turning back.

            Bernice hadn’t really cared and threw on a turtle neck and jeans. And it annoyed me that she still looked beautiful. Even with little make-up on and her hair falling from her ponytail, she was still going to get a lot of attention tonight.

            I didn’t take us long to work out which house was the one holding the party; the radiating bass noise was enough. Bernice let me go first up the path to the front door.

            The door was opened by a guy. He must have been about 17, his cheek bones high and pronounced. If I hadn’t have been so nervous, I may have taken in more.

            As soon as the door closed it was like a vacuum filled only with music and the smell of alcohol; a scent I wasn’t so naïve to know would soon be overpowered by the smell of sick.

            It didn’t take me long to find Sam even in the crowd. Suddenly, I felt my neurosis dissipate; my nerves fade and smiled at him.

            I pushed quickly and forcefully through the bulk of dancing, slightly tipsy, teenagers. Soon I was standing next to him.

            “Hey.” I smiled, trying to ignore the fact he already had a beer bottle in his hand and his breath already had a slightly lacing of alcohol.

            “Hi.” He lowered himself to kiss my cheek and I held my breath. It wasn’t like it was a stench, but it wasn’t something I was used to, and my senses were better now anyway.

            “You want to go somewhere quieter?” I shouted. I could barely hear myself over the music and until his nodded I was sure he hadn’t heard me.

            He walked me into the kitchen where I grabbed a bottle of J20 (obviously this party thrower knew how to treat their tee-totals) and leaned against the surface.

            “Pacing yourself are you?” Sam asked, nodding toward my drink choice. I nodded but couldn’t help but wonder; what would alcohol do to a Venatorian?

            The kitchen was a lot quieter and people weren’t rushing through it like I had expected.

            “Auda? Can I ask you something?” His eyes stayed to the floor.

            “Shoot.”

            “Why did you ask me here? We haven’t spoken in ages and out of the blue-”

            “Why not?” I smiled and his eyes came back to look at mine. I didn’t feel the need to continue but he seemed to be waiting for more.

            After a little more silence, he came and stood next to me. I tried to ignore the fact he was staring down at me and focused on swigging more juice. I was a hardcore partier.

            “You know I had the biggest crush on you before.” He chuckled slightly and I looked up.

            “I had an inkling.” I couldn’t help but beam as his looked a little deflated. I knew what he wanted to hear. “I had a crush on you too.”

            It was his mouths turn to turn up uncontrollably.

            “Auda, there you are.” Bernice came through, holding the door open enough for me to see about 5 guys watching her from across the other room. “How much longer must you put me through this?” She slammed the door behind her and dived straight for the beer.

            “It can’t be that bad.”

            “It is. All those men with IQs no larger than a gibbon just staring at me. Its sickening.” I giggled a littler.

            “Sam, this is Bernice. Bernice, Sam.”

            “Nice to meet you.” He said in his perfect gentleman voice.

            “See Auda, he can keep his eyes on my face!”

            I laughed again as she took a look gulp of beer.

            “She always like that?” Sam whispered to me.

            “Not always.” But she seemed a little more like her old erratic self, not as calm as she had been. But I knew why. She wasn’t annoyed too much about the attention, but that she could quite happily kill each one. She wanted to let go and see what would happen.

The party started to drag once Sam had to return to his friends. Bernice was becoming more and more annoyed and I knew she’d want to go soon. But I realised soon those boys weren’t just looking at her, but every girl in the room. I’d even got a second in their limelight.

            But Bernice wasn’t so convinced and I told her we’d go after I said goodbye to Sam.

            After asking a countless number of his friends if they’d seen him, I’d been wrongly pointed to the garden.

            The cold air was so refreshing compared to the cold, compact feel of the living room. I leaned my head against the wall and looked up to the darkening sky. Stars had started to shine and reflected in the pond next to me.

            “Auda.” Sam stumbled out of the door and chuckled a little.

            “Hey, I’ve been looking for you.”

            “I’ve been looking for you pretty lady.”

            Oh crap, he was drunk. I sighed a little.

            “Me and Bernice are going to be off home now.”

            “Oh no you’re not. Not until I get one thing.” He had squared in front of me by this point and I didn’t like it. He lowered himself in for a kiss and I managed to move so that he hit my cheek.

            “Playing hard to get?” His hand snapped to my face, keeping my head still. “Kiss me dammit.”

            All I could think was ‘don’t do it, not matter how much stronger you are.’

            But as he went in for a kiss this time, he started to press his body to mine just a little to much. As a human, he’d been stronger than me, but not now.

            “Get off me Sam.”

            “Just one kisss.” He hissed a little as the word slurred and I pushed back. Just enough to keep his body from me but not too much that he mistook me for superman, which in his current condition was likely.

            “Sam I mean it.”

            “So do I. You are so sexy.” His hands jumped to my waist and I’d had enough. As I pushed him back, I twisted my foot in between his feet and it twisted him. That with the force of my push sent his flying into the pond next to me.

            After he surfaced and I was certain he wasn’t drowning (laughing is always a good sign) I ran back inside, grabbed Bernice and I was out of there before I could let out the breath I was holding in.

            From what I knew about myself and about humans, neither were superior in times when its needed.

Thirteen

“Are you ever going to tell me what happened yesterday?” Bernice’s tone was clear even across the phone.

            “Maybe, but I need time for my mind to process it first.”

            “Ok, but you know I’m here when you want it.”

            “Thanks.” I laid out on my bed. “So you want to do something today?”

            “You know what I think we should do? We should hunt together.” I felt a lump hit my throat. She obviously took my silence as encouragement. “I have a power I want to show you.”

            “You got a power? What is it?”

            “Oh no, you have to see it.”

            I took a second to think about it. I didn’t want her to see me go crazy but I needed to practise self control to make this work.

            “Ok, but we’re doing everything your way.”

            “Of course.” The smiled crept into her voice and I wasn’t sure if I was excited, or worried by that.

            After hanging up and changing my clothes, I left the house, headed for the local park. Bernice had decided this was the best place to pick someone up.

            I sat on the bench, waiting, my leg shaking in a way I couldn’t control. As I watched the parents, the children, the elderly couples, I knew I could kill anyone I wanted. I could have fed off and drained any of them.

            Bernice slipped in beside me as I was gripping to the bench to stop me jumping up to maul the little girl on the swings.

            “Ready?”

            I nodded. My throat was still clogged and I was trying to keep my breathing level. I’d never done anything in a public place and it made me nervous. What was she planning to do? What was her way of hunting?

            She stood and strode towards a group of teenagers, mostly male. I tried to follow her gaze and found her looking at the shortest, just standing on the outside of the group.

            “Hey.” She smiled, throwing her hair over her shoulder as she got him. I knew that tone, the flirty tone.

            “Hello.” The guy smiled back, slightly worried but slightly intrigued. A look I’d watch many a bigger man wear.

            She walked past him a little, and in true male style, he turned to watch her walk away. As she turned back, I smiled. Slowly, she curled her index finger towards her.

            You may think this was her power, but this was normal for Bernice.

            I followed behind him as she took him towards the old abandoned scout hut. If he had been paying less attention to Bernice’s arse and more to the world, he might have been a little on edge.

            Bernice giggled as she grabbed the guy’s shirt, pulling him towards her.

            “You’re forward.”

            “You have no idea.” She whispered, getting closer. I kept my distance as her hand moved down to the left side of his chest and rest the tips of her fingers on him.

            Then it was all over in a flash. I knew what she had done as she pulled her extended bloody finger nails from his body. Nails that had been only a third of that side when they’d been resting on his chest.

            She’d gone all Wolverine on me.

            The boy struggled for a moment; clinging to Bernice for support even though she’d been the one to take it away in the first place.

            She brushed him off with little effort and he crumpled to the ground, now coughing up blood.

            For a second I wondered if Bernice had missed his heart. But soon I watched the colour drain from his face and I knew he was dead.

            I just stood, staring at the dead body, curled up in its own blood.

            “Cool huh?” Bernice smiled, licking the blood from her nails. “You want to go first?”

            “Uh… no.”

            “Fine then.” Bernice kneeled beside him, licking the blood from around him first.

            My mind could help but find itself jumping back into the memories I had of her. The little girl that used to play dolls with me. The kind that would get upset if she so much as hurt an insect.

            This was not the girl I knew.

            She gnawed into his wrist, slowly but surely biting his hand off. I felt bile gathering up toward my mouth.

            “I’ll be back in a bit.” I said hurriedly as I darted from the room and into the near by gathering of trees.

            As I wretched up the remains of my breakfast, I couldn’t help but wonder if this was ever going to get easier. Bernice had been changed after me and had grasped it much quicker. I was still sick at the sight.

            Admittedly, had it been me eating I might not have need to puke quite as much.      

            I leaned back on a tree, wiping my mouth with the back of my sleeve. The sweat dripped off me and I felt so weak. I needed food, but there was no way I was going back into that room.

            As quickly as my body would carry me, I found myself in the off-licence, standing in the queue with a packet of sausages.

            I was a failure again.

Fourteen

I couldn’t shake the feeling I had let down my whole race as I sat with Gran watching TV. I couldn’t look her in the eye. Years and years of history and knowledge and hunting, and I’d managed to fail this quickly.

            As I went to bed, the image of Bernice eating that boy stuck in my head and I could still taste the sick in my mouth.

            So when I woke up, I decided I had to get out of the house. Staying here would only mean feeling trapped by Gran, having to talk to her and having to control myself not to tell her.

            I walked around town again; sure I could find something to occupy my mind if I tried hard enough.

            But I hadn’t been thinking, as I walked up to starbucks, I hadn’t been thinking at all. And soon I felt like someone was watching me again. This time there was no spinning in circles, no searching. My eyes darted straight to the glass window and to him, staring at me.

            I held his gaze for a while, people walking past me but not registering.

            Then he smiled and looked down at his coffee. I didn’t know why, but I felt compelled to go to him, to sit with him, to ask him what the hell was his problem.

            So I walked into the coffee shop, got myself a muffin and slumped down opposite him.

            ‘What?” I asked as I looked at him again. “Just, what?”

            He chuckled slightly.

            “Brandon Swift?” He thrust out his hand to shake mine.

            “Excuse me.” I sighed. I was hoping he wouldn’t be an idiot.

            “It’s a name, well my name. And yours?”

            “Hang on a second, how can you not see I’m pissed at you?”

            “Well, its nice to meet you ‘pissed at you’.” His smiled grew smug.

            I put my hand on top of his.

            “Just so you know, I could crush you.”

            “Oh you could could you?”

            Now he was mocking me. I curled my hand round his and started to squeeze. I knew that to a human, this would have broken a bone, or at least make him squeal a little in pain.

            But Brandon just sat there, smiling.

            I tried harder. Not a single bone, no matter how small broke.

            “That would work if I was human.” He smiled leaning in. “Which I’m guessing your not either.” He clutched back at my hand and although it felt uncomfortable, it didn’t hurt.

            “Your Venatorian?” I asked stupidly.

            “Yep. But why are you being so viscous I only looked at you.”

            “Duh. That’s what we’re like.”       

            His smiled dropped. “Oh crap. And here I was thinking…”

            “Thinking what?”

            “Don’t worry. I… I gotta…” He got up quickly and headed for the toilets.

            I leaned back. So he was Venatorian, but someone had obviously taught him we were peaceful.

            What a load of crap.

            I reached into my pocket, checking that no one else was watching me, and slip one of my Gran’s pills into what was left of his coffee.

            When he came back, he downed it. He made up some pathetic excuse and started to walk out. Giving him a few minutes head start, I followed slowly behind him. Soon he would get drowsy and it wasn’t long to my house.

            I speed dialled home.

            “Gran. I need you to take the delivery man out of the room. I might have found something better.” She sounded excited as she talked about making freezer meals from him and hung up.

            I cringed a little at the thought of chopped up dead guy in the freezer, but kept my cool.

            Soon I saw him swaying and ran forward to hold him up.

            “Its ok, you’re coming with me.”

Fifteen

Gran looked almost ecstatic as I dragged Brandon in to the house, his head lolling forward.

            “I’ve cleared the room.” She beamed.

            I thanked her and carried Brandon up to the room and threw him in the seat. All I could do was wait for him to wake up. So I sat across the room, leaning against the wall.

            I glanced over his strong body. It was a miracle I managed to hoist him up here.

            I rested my head on my shoulder, just keeping my eyes on him. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to look away, but more like I couldn’t.

            Of course I managed to, because soon I found myself waking from a sleep. One of those sleeps that could have been 2 minutes or could have been 2 hours. But he was watching me as I lifted my head.

            “Sleeping beauty awakes.” He was mocking me too much for me to register the ‘beauty’ part. I jumped to my feet. “And what, may I ask, am I doing here?”

            “I want to know what you meant.”

            He sighed. “If you don’t know, it’s probably best that I’m not the one to tell you.”

            “Tell me!” I screamed as I ran forward and slammed my hands down on his.

            He laughed as my face was centimetres from mine.

            “Typical Cruentian. Always throwing their weight about.”

            “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

            Now he was almost in hysterics and I was ready to fly into a rage. But I threw myself back from the chair and smiled back. “You seem to forget that I am the one in control. You are the one tied up.”

            He’s laughing stopped but his smile was still very present. “When was the last time you had meat huh? A proper slab of meat? I had one before I left today. Even your drugs won’t affect how strong I am. You’re not in charge.”

            “Oh really.” I ran to the back of the room and pulled a knife from the Gran stash. I moved up closer to him and placed the knife at his neck. “How can you be so sure of that?”

            “Go on then. Do it.” He stared me in the eye, watching my reaction. I wanted to do it, and the sudden idea of the blood made my mouth water. But as I stared into his eyes, I couldn’t help but struggle.

            I quickly pulled the knife away from him and let my hand fall to my side.

            “If you don’t tell me what is going on, I swear I will do it. And I will enjoy it.”

            “I don’t doubt that for a second.” He grinned with an air of cockiness.

            I moved back to lean against the far wall from him. He cleared his throat and I knew this wasn’t going to be a short conversation.

            “Ok. You know how humans can be broken down into quite a few groups. Whether it’s male and female or nationality. They can be human will being different to others.”

            I nodded.

            “Well, the only way I can explain it is that you are Cruentian and I am Mansuetian, so it’s like you are English and I am... say American. We speak the same language but have very different methods of getting things done.”

            “What is that supposed to mean?” I asked after he had stopped.

            He sighed. “I’m guessing you are being taught to hunt humans, to eat them. Being taught that hunting is essential for your survival. Yes?”

            “Yes.”

            “They are lying to you.”

            I stood standing now. “What?”

            “You don’t need human. Yes you need meat. But for some reason Cruentians have got to the point where they are teaching their young that it is all they must live for.”

            “Hang on.” I took a second to breath, my hand running down my face. “So you’re telling me all Cruentians know this. And they still teach it.”

            “Yes. The test of a true Cruentian is to know this and still hunt humans.”      

            He gave me a little while for this to sink in. “And what about Mansuetians?” I asked.

            “We are a completely different clan. We eat meat but its animal meat. It means we can blend in better with humans as we are able to sit and eat meals with them. We don’t have to kill anyone for it.”

            I stared him in the eye. That all seemed a lot more desirable... if he was telling the truth.

            “Why are you telling me this?”

            He smiled the first genuine smile I’d seen from him.

            “You have to know, so you can decide what you want to do. Obviously, your elders are trying to keep you from understanding.”

            “But why?”

            “That I don’t know. But I know one thing, you’re not a killer. And Cruentians only have room for killers.”

Sixteen

I slid down the wall till I was sitting on the floor.

            “So...?” My mind was racing and I couldn’t grasp hold of any of the questions speeding around in my head. I took a deep breath and tried to control myself. “How? How are there two clans?”

            “No one knows exactly what happened. It was decades ago, more than that in fact. It’s thought that neither head of either clan was around when it started, or even born.”

            I thought back to Viator. He was 150.

            “Go on.”

            “Ok. The leader of the Venatorians, Devera was a peaceful man. He would reach out to the members of the human community. He would also change the humans who were ill. For example, anyone with a terminal illness, he would save by making them one of us.

            “Devera was married to a beautiful and intelligent woman Elainest. She would go with him to the hospitals, as she was a nurse when she was human, and she would help Devera pick the weakest people that needed him. Together, they helped so many people.

            “But Devera also had a brother, Sicitar. He was jealous of his brother and of his brothers wife. He wanted the power, the woman and the love of the people. So, he plotted to kill Elainest. With her out of the way, Devera would be a mess and Sicitar would be able to gain the love of the people.

            “But there was a problem Sicitar hadn’t seen coming. Sicitar had to spend more time with her to get a grip on her life and the best way to kill her. He hadn’t known that Elainest had the power of imprinting.

            “It meant that she could effectively make men fall in love with her. She was more powerful though than any previous Venatorian with this power. With more, if they imprint with one person, that bond is strong and only ever broken by a stronger imprint with another. Elainest could do one better. She could imprint with multiple people.

            “So Sicitar was taken aback when he realised they were slowly imprinting. Instead of trying to kill Elainest, he fell in love with her and started an affair. But they weren’t clever about it. Soon Devera found them entangled in his bed.

            “He locked them both in separate cells for a days, only letting them have any contact with people when they were fed. He thought and thought about what had happened and decided to forgive his wife.

            “He set her free but kept his brother chained and locked. But what Devera hadn’t known was that the imprint between his brother and his wife was stronger than the one he held.

            “Elainest spent weeks begging her husband to let Sicitar go. But he wouldn’t. He needed to punish his brother.

            “Elainest couldn’t take this and a week later, she was found in the cell next to Sicitar, her wrists cut and a note left behind. It told Devera that she was sorry but Sicitar was the love of her life and that she would not live in a world where she had to be separated from him for so long.

            “So you can imagine, Devera was devastated. After another few days of morning, he let his brother free for the funeral. During the funeral, he attacked anyone who said anything against Elainest. It eventually ended in him mauling a young maid that had been close to Elainest but had called her a slut in the earshot of Sicitar. He got so angry, he started to bite her.

            “When he was pulled off the young girl, flesh hanging from his mouth, he declared he wasn’t sorry. He managed to escape after that before anyone could prosecute him for anything. Its rumoured some loyal followers of his ran with him, and started a new clan of Venatorians.”

            “Cruentians.” I whispered, the first word I’d said throughout his intense story telling.

            “Yes. Devera carried on with his work and the Mansuetians were born too.”

            I took another moment of silence to breath.

            “So are you going to be like Devera and keep me locked up forever.”

            I looked up to him as he turned his hands up questioningly at me.

            “No.” I got up and started to untie his body. “I don’t want you mauling me thank you.”

            “Never would.” He smiled as he stood and rubbed his wrists. “Now you have to decide what you want to do. Stay with the Cruentians and kill. Or switch to my side.”

            I looked to the floor.

            “You don’t need to deside now.” He stood and lifted my head with his finger. “That will come later. But if you ever need to talk to me, I’m always here.” He handed me a small business card with his number, stared into my eyes for a sec and headed for the door.

Seventeen

I was quiet as Gran switched through the channels. I guess I was still processing through what Brandon had told me, still trying to get my head around it.

            How could one woman have caused that much crap?

            “Gran.” She smiled up to me, nodding.

            “Yes.”

            “How come you never told me about the Mansuetians?” I’d decided that a direct approach was the only one that was going to get me anywhere.

            She started with a small smile and I light giggle. “What do you mean?”

            After a little silence, she realised I was serious. “Who told you?” Her tone was dark and deadly.

            “Doesn’t matter. Why didn’t you tell me?”

            “Viator says we can’t tell new borns until they are fully fit and able-”

            “And completely versed in the Cruentian ways?” I finished for her.

            “If so. But you younger ones aren’t able to handle it if we tell you straight out. Now, who told you?” A vein popped up in my forehead, her frustration was boiling. But I completely ignored her question.

            “So what actually happened?”

            Gran sighed. “The leader of the Cruentians had the power to imprint. He imprinted with his brother’s wife and schemed to make her kill herself. This meant that he could have taken the power. Only his brother had a power that kept the majority of people on his side. Our leader ran away with the few that were immune and started up our clan. It wasn’t long before we had grown in number and strength and became the bigger and better of the clans.”

            “How many other clans are there?”

            “Just the two.”

            I nodded. But I couldn’t shake the feeling Gran was lying to me. Or at least not telling me the full truth. I had known her long enough that I could usually tell immediately that she was lying, today it was all fuzzy and unclear.

            “Believe me Auda, if I could have told you, I would have.”

            I nodded again, my neck starting to hurt and made my way upstairs. I felt suffocating in her presence. Her authority but her obviously lack of thought for me. That wasn’t the Gran I’d known.

            And I needed to talk to someone.

            I dialled Bernice’s house number before I knew what I was doing and was more than relieved to hear her voice first.

            “Hello.”

            “Bernice.”

            “Hey Auda. You ok? You sound out of breath.”

            I ignored my unsteady heart beat. “I’m fine. I just wanted to talk.”

            “Oh, cool. Hey, I think I might have overheard what happened to Casper.”

            I smiled and sat down as the intriguing sentence whirled around my mind. This should take my mind off it.

            “Go on.” I leaned back on my bed.

            “Well, my new mentor went out for just a second when another elder came up and wanted to talk to him. I, naturally, shoved my ear to the door. From what I picked up, I think I know what happened.”

            The silence she let settle I knew was for effect.

            “Tell me Bernice.”

            “Ok ok, impatient. He went against our way. He challenged Viator somehow. And I think, but I can’t be sure, that they fought.”

            “So what happened to Casper?”

            “He lost. And it was a fight to the death.”

            I took in a sharp breath. I really hadn’t been expecting that.

            “But at least it tells us one thing.” Bernice continued. “You do not mess with Viator.” She laughed and I faked one along with her.

            “Well, I have homework.”

            “Yeah see you tomorrow Auda.” I could hear the smile in her voice and tried to slip one into my goodbye.

            I can’t even begin to fake control over myself. This day had completely messed with my head. First I’m told about a whole new group of Venatorians that sound an awful lot more like me. Then, Gran comes up with a different story. And now I find out to go against Viator and the Cruentians meant death.

            I was screwed.

            I couldn’t work out why I trusted Brandon more than Gran, but somewhere deep down inside of me, I was sure he wasn’t lying. Even if he was taught wrong, he only told me what he knew. Gran knew better, I was sure of it.

            But to find out that Casper was dead. Ok, so I wasn’t always his biggest fan, but no one deserves that.

            I cursed myself at the last thought. But it confirmed one thing.

            I was not Cruentian by nature and I could never tell another Cruentian that.

            Now I just had to hope it was something you could learn.

Eighteen

I almost ran home after school the next day. I knew Gran would be teaching, and I had decided around 3^rd period there was only one person I could talk to.

            Brandon.

            So, with shaking hands and an awaiting mind, I dialled and listened to the tone changing.

            “Hello Auda.”           

            I was quiet for a short second. “How did you know it was me?”

            “I don’t give my number out to just anyone. What can I do for you?”

            “I... I needed to talk to someone. And, well, you’re the only person that might even begin to understand what’s going on in my mind.” I imagined him nodding in the silence.

            “So, what is going on?” He asked, his tone softening from cocky to comforting in seconds.

            “I don’t know if I’m cut out for this.” I slumped down on my bed. Those words sounded even more pathetic out loud. Like I was moaning, a young child stuck on a math question.

            “Being a Venatorian, or being a Cruentian?”

            I sighed. “I really don’t know. What’s life like as a Mansuetian?” I asked.

            “Easier I would imagine. We don’t have to change much from human to us because we can just blend in.”

            “Does sound easier.”

            He chuckled. “I bet all Cruentians feel like this at some point.”

            “I doubt it. My best friend was changed after me and the other day I watched her kill and eat a person.” I didn’t know why I was telling him this, but I felt comfortable enough that it was just spilling out.

            “Well, she sounds a delight.”

            I laughed. A proper laugh for the first time in days.

            “But what did you do while your friend was gutting this poor man?”

            “...I was puking in the bushes.”

            “Ah. Nice.”

            “I really don’t think the murder of random and innocent people is something that will catch on for me.”

            “Give it time. Maybe your body just needs to get used to the sights, sounds and smells.”

            “That’s just it. It’s only the sights I have a reaction to. The one time I fed, I loved the taste and the smell. I... I felt like a monster as I feasted on this guy’s finger.”

            “At least it was just his finger and wasn’t life threatening.” I tried to push the image of the frozen delivery man downstairs. “But have you tried animal meat since you have changed?”

            “Yeah.”

            “And does it give the same effect?”

            “It satisfies me, but I don’t lose my head like I did with the human. I didn’t feel I needed to scoff it there and then.”

            “And the shame afterwards? I’m guessing there wasn’t any of that?”

            “Actually. I did feel ashamed, but only because I thought this was wrong and that all Venatorians should be hunting, not going to the butchers.”

            He chuckled slightly again. “It does sound like you belong with us. But I’m sure you have many friends and family in your clan. A complete uproot wouldn’t not be wise or advisable.”

            “Then what can I do?”

            “Meet me, regularly. Together, you can learn our ways and I’m sure between us we can come up with ways to stop your family from finding out.”

            “I don’t know... I’ve only just met you.”

            “So its fine for you to drug me, but meeting is out of the question?”

            I giggled again.

            “Maybe your right.”

            “It doesn’t have to be regular. Just whenever you need to talk, or you think you’re going to lose it.”

            I agreed and he gave me his address. It was the other side of town. Obviously the clans wanted to keep well apart.

            “Don’t worry Auda. Everything is going to be ok. We’ll figure this out, together.”

            “Thank you so much Brandon.”

            “Anytime.”

            A few moments of silence passed as we both waited for the other to hang up. Eventually, he did.

            I felt a tug in my stomach. I didn’t want him to hang up.  He was my link to sanity and my only chance to say what I was really feeling.

            But I closed my phone and laid out on my bed. What was the deal with Brandon? Why did I feel I could trust him already?

            I grabbed my book and flicked through the section on powers. There had to be one he had to make me feel at ease, or even to put ideas in my head.

            But I found nothing, till I turned to the last page of the powers.

                        Imprinting 

                        Imprinting is complicated and unusual. It is the process of a invisible but                                strong bond forming between two Venatorians, regardless of age, race or                             gender. It is the abliaty of one person. The person that holds tha ablilty, holds                the power, and a strong imprint can only be broken by the formation of                             another.

                        When imprinted, the couple feel at ease when together. However, usually the                      Venatorian without the ability will feel constantly on edge and in need of the              other. This can lead to a few cases of self harm.

                        Although the imprint starts as just a mental connection, a imprint can only be                        truly formed during a physical relationship. Without this element, it is more                             simply broken and easily discounted by the imprinter. The physical                                         relationship seals the bond and gratifies both sides.

                        Very rarely, a person can imprint with multiple people without affecting the                             original imprint. This has only happened a few times in history though.

                        A little less rarely, two people with the ability to imprint will meet and imprint                on each other. However, contrary to belief, these are not two separate                          imprints and do not make the bond stronger. The strongest imprint will be the               one formed first. A double imprint like this will have a weaker affect on both                      parties and so, while both will feel alone without the other, they will not                                     usually result to drastic measures.

            I couldn’t help but wonder if the legend was based around a double imprint that no one understood. Maybe both sides were right.

            But I also couldn’t stop myself from thinking. ‘Maybe me and Brandon... maybe we’re imprinting.’

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